AWKWARD: Because Perfection is Boring: How many lanes does it take to get a freakin' returned phone call around here?

  1. How many lanes does it take to get a freakin’ returned phone call around here?

    Never get in a car accident. It’s nearly a month later and I’m still dealing with the aftermath.

    The day after the accident, a representative from the rental company in question’s insurance company called me. As I was busy sitting on the beach, I missed the call. Returning it the following week, I was met with a friendly voicemail greeting encouraging me to leave my name, claim number, and a brief message! I did those things and heard nothing from this woman who was supposedly in her office Monday through Friday from 7 a.m. until 4 p.m.

    Over the course of two weeks I called at least four times and left several messages. Not a single call was returned. I then received word from the staff assistant that their insurance company, who also tried to contact these people, was trying to contact me directly. I called her and, of course, received no answer.

    Over the weekend I received a pointed letter from the rental insurance company letting it be known that they MUST speak with me.

    I am well aware of this. That’s why I’ve spent the past month RETURNING THEIR CALLS.

    I missed another call from them a few days ago. They have called during probably the only two times this month I haven’t been able to answer my phone. Dumb luck.

    Today I decided to call them back. I finally was able to speak with someone who wasn’t a recording, who recorded a statement from me and asked me all sorts of questions about an incident that occurred a month ago that I vaguely remember. She told me to say, “I don’t know” or “I don’t remember” if I, you know, didn’t know or remember the answers. I tried this when she asked me how many lanes are on the street in question, going in each direction. Sorry, but I’m not a map. I don’t carry this information with me at all times. If someone can recall offhand how many lanes are at Arch approaching 16th, the insurance company would love to know.

    I answered their questions truthfully, at which time I was informed that the other driver is now suing for injuries. This man, who couldn’t have been nicer about the incident, stated in a police report that he was not injured. Where did these magical injuries come from, in what was barely an accident? I didn’t feel it. Maybe it’s different for me, since I was in a giant van and he was in a substantially smaller vehicle, but still, his car was dented and scratched. Nothing was totaled. I’d call that a minor accident, considering we both walked away from the scene unscathed.

    Or so I thought.

    I just have to wonder, what are these mystical injuries? And when did this man become so vindictive?

    Either way, I’m pretty sure I’ll never trust myself with one of this big cargo vans again.

    ~Valerie Williams
    valerieleewilliams@gmail.com
    Philadelphia, PA

     
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