Death and taxes, oh and Facebook
“Listen,” I said over sushi, completely unprovoked. “Something’s kind of bothering me.”
What? He asked, concerned. Was something wrong with my spicy tuna roll? Did I have a bite of rice gone awry?
“Do you want to see other people?” I continued, the words spilling out of my mouth faster than I could say ‘spicy, crunchy yellow tail roll,’ which I promptly stuffed in my to plug up the vocal leakage.
“Where is this coming from?”
“Your Facebook status. It says your single.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“Ya. Ya I am.” I said, with laugh and gesticulation to suggest casual indifference. Totally kidding, I am.
subject change. Insert talk of apartment hunting, weekend plans and wow, this is really good sushi.
Five minutes elapse.
“So, are you going to change your Facebook status?”
“Boy, I’m glad my girlfriend isn’t a crazy person.”
“Hm, you have a girlfriend huh? That’s funny, because it says you’re single on Facebook.”
“Erin, we’re dating, aren’t we? Why does this even matter?
“Oh, right. No, it’s totally stupid. “
subject change. Insert talk of the new Indiana Jones movie, three-legged dogs, and damn, this wasabi’s spicy
I swallowed my last piece of fish. My unoccupied mouth is a traitorous scab.
“I’m sure it’s not because you’re ashamed of me. I’m sure it isn’t because you want to poke other girls…Ha, sike.”
Check comes
“What do you want to do now?”
“I have a good idea. Let’s go home and change our Facebook stati. Haha, totally…”
“No you’re not.”