Women wallow.
I flip open the screen of my laptop, click some random John Mayer song, close my eyes… and wallow.
But the definition of wallow, in a melodramatic sens, does not exist. Definitions #1-#4 make no reference to sadness. Despair. Hopelessness.
wal·low 
/ˈwɒloʊ/ [wol-oh]
We have created our own definition of wallow. And because we have created our definition of its existence, use, and inevitable action, we must also create our own definition of how we may overcome it, and how we can “wallow” and be empowered by its negativity.
I listen to John Mayer talk about his women’s “body being a wonderland,” or Lenny Kravitz crooning about whether he’ll see his one-night-stand-love ever “again.” I wonder how these men can wallow, but why I never hear of real, non-musician men wallowing for the women beyond the song. Girls like me.
It is almost as if men can wallow in song, because song is not reality. But women: we are left to wallow in a reality that is fueled by listening to that fictional song. We listen to men pine over women and are falsely led to believe that yes, someone out there pines for me like that, too.
I don’t believe men mourn the same way as women. Men don’t wallow. Men drink beer, hook up, move forward.
But I sit on my couch, and I wallow. Neither luxuriously, nor rolling about, surging or floundering. I do not move. I do nothing.
Women must wallow and then be wallowed by it. We must be inspired by the emotion that surges through us— take advantage of the luxury already evident in our lives. We must flounder away from the couch, turn off Johnny, and put on some Courtney Love.
WALLOW
Definition #5
1.) To feel saddened by the loss, unfulfillment, or rejection of love, resulting in a surge of confidence and empowerment felt by that person whom initially wallowed.
Johnny and Lenny make us wallow, but it is our own song that we are wallowed by.
