February 2008
85 posts
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.26 // posted...
APLOMB \uh-PLOM, noun:
Assurance of manner or of action; self-possession; confidence; coolness.
I approached my interview with the assurance of a pro. Let’s just say I had my APLOMB down, baby.
Betty Confidential :: "Getting to know my sister" →
When we leave for college, we do more than leave our childhood rooms behind. We leave our childhood playmates behind, too: Our siblings.
Freshman year, my brother was still a hyperactive 14-year-old. He hardly showered, rode a bike and did everything in his will power to annoy me.
Now, he is 18-years-old and randomly texting me, “Yo sis, I’m in Philly at a kegger tonight. Wanna...
If I knew then what I know now.
If I knew then what I know now, I would have done differently at age…
3-YEARS-OLD: I wouldn’t have cut my bangs with scissors behind the couch. This incident naturally led to an obsession with cutting my hair.
6-YEARS-OLD: Quit dance class. I may not have been petite and probably towered over all the other girls, but hey. Tall girls can do twirls and spins too.
9-YEARS-OLD: Cried...
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.24 // 1:15AM...
IRRUPT \ih-RUHPT, intransitive verb:
1. To burst in forcibly or suddenly; to intrude. 2. (Ecology) To increase rapidly in number.
Without consideration to the other actors standing by, he IRRUPTED onto the stage scene— and he wasn’t wearing any underwear.
WATCH
THIS
My breasts: I love you/I hate you [an homage to...
I love you breasts …
1.) For representing my womanhood.
2.) For giving me lift without a Victoria’s Secret $60 bra.
3.) For helping me realize that so-called best friend in the 5th grade who flushed my bra down the toliet because she was jealous of my pudding chest, wasn’t really my best friend after all.
4.) For someday feeding my infant children, their milk helping to...
“Girl, I know you like the cold. Cause you wearin’ that hat … and you...”
– -AWKWARD pick up line #2. Check out #1, Super Fresh style.
Heard from a city-hired snow shoveler while I was busy scraping snow off my car following a 4-inch snow storm in Philadelphia.
I was wearing my Russian style fur hat.
Best compliment all day.
If my ego weren't bruised from my last Criag's...
If you’re the type that reads Missed Connections just for kicks - m4w - 29
Reply to: pers-XXXXXXXX@craigslist.org Date: 2008-02-21, 5:41PM EST then maybe you’re like me… I find myself wondering who these people are. From the poetic, to the pathetic, the hopeful to the downtrodden, it seems that this little slice of the internet is a pretty good cross-section of New York....
Color-sensitive does not mean color-blind
Someone commented I was propogating a negative stereotype in a prior post because I mentioned the groper was Latino.
That struck me as a strange comment. I meant nothing by it, other than I thought it to be a pretty good way of describing what the dude looked like. I mean, he had no distinguishing marks on him; no beard or tatoo or lightning bolt shaped scar on his cheek (that would’ve been...
Passive Agressive Haiku #8: Why are men so...
I said you were weird A compliment, so I thought But, you got mad. Whoops.
dictionary.com word of the day 2. 22 // 1:26 PM
dissolute \DIS-uh-loot, adjective: Loose in morals and conduct; marked by indulgence in sensual pleasures or vices.
The real measure of a man is, is he dissolute? If he finds $100 bill on the sidewalk, would he look (in earnest) for its owner? If he got married, would he cheat on his wife? Does he do the right thing, even when no one’s looking?
John Chiara Photography at NYC gallery
Click here to read the diddy I wrote about it, and please visit the gallery website. His method and scope is pretty sweet.
The Groper Rides the 6 Train
Attention ladies of the New York dwelling variety: The Groper rides the 6 train at approximately 2:45 pm, headed uptown from Union Square. I know because I’ve seen him there twice.
Who: The Groper is a Latino, heavy set man. Probably around 40 years old, and has dark eyes. What: The Groper likes to put his hands on women’s crotches. Ok, I can’t speak for every woman. But he sure...
Rad Jokes that Actually Suck
BLACKBOOK: What’s the best joke you’ve ever heard?
ZACH CREGGER: Holy shit, I don’t know. Oh, I know what it is. It’s stupid as hell. There’s a piece of bacon and an egg sitting in the frying pan, and the egg looks over to the bacon and says, “It’s hot in here.” And the bacon sits up and says, “Holy shit, a talking egg!”
See the original posting here.
Have a rad joke that actually kind of...
Shallow Helen
According to a recent Newsweek article, “The Real Law of Attraction,” looks like that old adage a woman is only after a guys’ money, and a guy is only after a woman’s looks, is totally wrong. Women are all about the looks, too.
Northwestern University social psychologists Eli Finkel and Paul Eastwick invited 163 undergraduate college students to a two-hour speed-dating event. Each student...
Why little should stay little.
I’m 19, 5’3”, and look like I’m 15. My sister is 12, 5’2”, and looks like she’s 15. Sometime during my senior year, while I was preoccupied with college applications, prom arrangements and graduation parties, my sister went from 11 going on 12 to 12 going on 17. She started wearing make up (and plenty of it), shopping at “the cool stores,”...
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.18 // 9:45AM
SINE QUA NON \sin-ih-kwah-NON; -NOHN; sy-nih-kway-, noun:
An essential condition or element; an indispensable thing.
The medicine was sine qua non to her recovery. Without it, she would surely die of heartbreak and despair.
A particularly poignant missed connection...
Realizing it’s over for good - m4w
Reply to: pers-5XXXXXXXX@craigslist.org Date: 2008-02-17, 11:20AM EST Writing a letter explaining how you feel is supposed to help the grieving process, but never under any circumstances should you send that letter. Instead, i guess i can just strip away names and throw it out here, so it feels more like a letter, an less like an angsty teenage diary...
How I feel when people die... stream of...
In my life, I’ve only been close to a handful of deceased individuals. My grandmother when I was 14. My cousin when I was 17. An acquaintance in high school when I was 18.
Today I learned that my roommate’s father passed away from cancer. She knew his time was short, but she never had her chance to say goodbye.
I can’t even imagine what she is feeling right now: Despair,...
“Now that’s a super model right there.”
– A friendly Super Fresh stocker at the Columbus Blvd., Philadelphia store location, 11:45PM. Thanks for making my Saturday night… grocery shopping.
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.16 // 9:07AM
VIRAGO \vuh-RAH-go; vuh-RAY-go, noun:
1. A woman of extraordinary stature, strength, and courage. 2. A woman regarded as loud, scolding, ill-tempered, quarrelsome, or overbearing.
While it was her VIRAGO strength that saved the town in the end, once the risk had subsided, they returned her to baking bread in the town square, unused and underappreciated muscles rippling beneath her apron.
My name is Sammy Davis, and people think I'm...
When my mom was pregnant, she enjoyed watching Bewitched.
No, I’m not talking about the shitty Nicole Kidman-Will Ferrell 2005 version (why do such great actors make such horrific movies?) but the Nick-at-Nite classic 1964 version with the beautiful Elizabeth Montgomery.
She liked the show so much, that she named me after the nose twitching Samantha.
Samantha Marie Davis, born...
They asked me to write about V-Day...
I don’t know why being alone today is worse than the 364 days I rather revel in my single hood (or, at least it doesn’t make me want to sit on my couch and eat an entire bag of pretzels). Maybe it’s the fact when I was taking the mail to the post office for my internship, I saw two separate couples making out on the street, and it grossed me out. Maybe it’s because I had to...
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.13 // 12:17AM...
PERDURABLE \pur-DUR-uh-bul; pur-DYUR-, adjective:
Very durable; lasting; continuing long.
The girls in the gym locker room used to talk about how PERDURABLE Trojan condoms really are. Who would have thought latex was so great?
BlackBook Magazine: American Gladiator what?
Justice’s PR people are persistent little buggers, so editor Nick ordered up in irreverent interview (BlackBook readers aren’t exactaly American Gladiator watchers…) “Could you do sort of a snarky, indifferent interview,” Nick asked. Sarcasm, snark, indifference what? “Consider it done,”
Spunk sells
Spring ‘07, A truck driver found a painting she believed to be a Pollock. She bought it for $5, and was offered $9 million by a collector who believed it to be an original (the verdict is still out in terms of authenticity).
Pollock made those paintings by dripping, splattering and pouring paint on a canvas. His “drip” paintings started to sell in the early 1950s. His reputation...
High art/low brow joke of the day:
“I blasted her face like a Jackson Pollock.”
Speaking of shoving Barbies up your butt...
The thought never crossed my mind to use bodily fluids as a medium, but then again I can’t even draw a stick figure to save my life so I guess I’m no artist. Turns out Paul McCarthy isn’t the first contemporary artist to use vomit, blood, and butt Barbies for artistic expression: Andy Warhol liked to paint with piss, and Jackson Pollock apprently prefered spunk (can’t tell...
Sammy asked me to write about V-day
…but I really can’t because I think it’s the stupidest holiday, right behind Christmas, designed to either a) make people who are stag tomorrow feel bad about themselves, or b) cause people to fool themselves; “I must be in love” they’ll say, so they fit in and can buy one of those gross chocolates with the sick shit in the middle and give it to the person they...
Losing your V-card to gothic music
SMD478: i sort of want to upload a marilyn manson song tomorrow
SMD478: how do you feel about that?
echicks: i fucking hate vday
echicks: awesome
SMD478: rad.
echicks: the pill song is good
SMD478: LOVE that song
SMD478: what's funny about marilyn manson is my first serious boyfriend loved manson
SMD478: and i lost my v card with manson on in the background
SMD478: and that anniversary is like in a week
SMD478: on 2/24
SMD478: 7 years!
echicks: that's an amazing story
echicks: I lost my to orgy
echicks: our friendship is solidified now
echicks: that's incredible
SMD478: i think we discussed the orgy-manson thing in boston
SMD478: wait
echicks: oh we did
echicks: i'm just recalling it
echicks: because its amazing
The day I fell in love
Most of us can pin point it to a moment, or at the very least, a day: That fold in time when we realize that we have fallen in love; when what matters the most in our day-by-day existence is the happiness of someone else. Because their happiness is your happiness. And you trust that your happiness is their happiness, too. Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, and I am not in love. I haven’t been...
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.12 // 11:16PM
COPACETIC \koh-puh-SET-ik, adjective: Very satisfactory; fine.
It was a mild night and all seemed COPACETIC. At least, so it seemed: Below the surface were rumblings of anarchy and an eventual usurp of the unfair administration.
Dating columns bring the boys back
So I just started to write a relationship column for my school newspaper and I was warned from day one that I would have to delve into my personal life in order to make the column effective. Totally fine. My life is an open book and those who know me know I’m notorious for dating and capturing many guys’ hearts on campus and beyond. I’ve never been ashamed of this or felt the need to explain...
“It’s like I’m even sick of hearing myself bitch.”
– Erin E on the state of her life, via text message, 5:38PM.
Growing up is hard to do
“I have my own fucking issues.”
This is what my mother told me on the phone late Friday night.
The flu had caught me. God had pulled my life from beneath my feet like a ragged carpet.
Life wasn’t stopping because I wouldn’t stop coughing. Responsibility wasn’t going away because I had a 100 degree fever. Gmail didn’t have an automatic “Sammy is sick,...
Dictionary.com word of the day // 2.11 // 11:30PM
ERSATZ \AIR-sahts; UR-sats, adjective:
Being a substitute or imitation, usually an inferior one.
He was just an ERSATZ for my true love, who would never reciprocate nor admit his lack of feelings for me. So I resorted to cheap substitution.
